Change Doesn’t Have to Change You
Written by: Staff Therapist Chanel Durham
Transitional periods are some of the most uprooting times of our lives. They can be the very thing that arrives without warning, but yet we are forced to navigate through to get to the next season. Some shifts are subtle like a small change in responsibilities, family dynamics, or a new role at work that overall alters the rhythm we were once accustomed to. Other times, the transitions are abrupt, shaking the very foundation you once relied on. Regardless of how it arrives, the impact could feel heavier than expected. In my recent sessions, this theme has come up again and again: the experience of being surrounded by change leaving one to feel the familiar version of themselves slipping away. Transition has a way of quietly loosening the parts of us that once felt neatly held together.
It’s rarely a dramatic falling apart; it’s more of a subtle shifting like routines that no longer feel grounding, identities that no longer fit the way they once did, expectations that suddenly feel out of alignment with who you’re becoming. When things begin to move faster than you can process them, it’s easy to feel detached from yourself, unsure of your footing.
The truth is, what makes transitional periods so difficult is that the shift isn’t only happening around you; it’s happening within you. Your internal world starts rearranging itself, trying to make sense of what’s new while slowly releasing what no longer belongs. That internal work can feel heavy. You may find yourself questioning your identity, doubting your abilities, feeling unusually tender, or noticing a kind of disconnect from your own body or your usual sense of groundedness. If you’ve been feeling this, there is nothing wrong with you. This is what it looks like when your inner system is trying to reorganize itself in real time.
One grounding practice I share with clients in these moments is the reminder to return to what remains true about you, even as everything else shifts.
Ask yourself: What part of me stays the same, no matter what season I’m in? The answers won’t come from roles, titles, or responsibilities because those are the very things that tend to change. Instead, these truths come from your core: your compassion, your creativity, your resilience, the way you show up for the people you care about, the softness you hold even when you’re tired.
Slow down, ask the question, identify one or two pieces of yourself that feel steady, and let those be your anchor.
This exercise is is not meant to figure out the entire future, just to help you take the next step.
If you’re moving through a transitional season right now, in that space between who you were and who you are becoming, I hope you allow yourself to take your time. You are not lost; you are simply being rearranged. And even in the moments that feel unsteady, the core of who you are is still present.
If this blog resonates, let’s pick this up in session together! I am currently accepting new clients. Please use this link to schedule a free 15-20 minute consultation. You do not have to travel the road of change alone.
~Chanel